start a fire

On a Leo moon this beautiful day, my co-star app tells me: “Start a fire”. 

My van is pulled over on the side of a road, staring at the Tantalus mountains that actually do tantalize me - despite the terrifying, buzzing of the giant electric machine above my head, I feel at peace. Griff is roaming, the birds are monitoring his progress with talkative chirps, and I try to breathe in the sun through every cell of my body.

The heat is needed : the water of Squamish is as cold as a homemade ice plunge. All water is healing, but when it comes straight off these mountains… ’tis truly magic. I’ll be in it as often as I need, pushing past all the resistance to heal my edges and wounds, purifying my pores as I navigate a transformation of life that I have had yet to experience. This one has been deeper, wider, larger. A crater in the moon, proof of impact, providing texture and mystery that one day will make more sense than it does now. 

The sun just poked out from under the cloud just now , blasting me with rays and heat - reminding me as a response to my moody visual above that I am both moon and sun. “I Am Much Better For iI” plays in the background, and I feel the energy inside my body light up, join forces, and beam straight back to the sun as a humble ‘thank you’. 

Facing West, cross legged, I think about what I have in my “drafts” - a metaphorical mountain of papers in form of unfinished thoughts, ideas, notes, texts-to-self, and scribbles. Perhaps this paper is the kindling to my fire, learning that which starts the fire is maybe just as important as the fire itself. 

If fire purifies all it touches
and we need everything new
may my exhales nurture these flames
and may I always have courage
to know what is kindle


(and
to breathe for more than just me.)

Shall we start a fire?

xx

Em